Saturday, September 29, 2007

Selective Perception

I was just outside the wifi-enabled coffeeshop where I often hang out, having a cigarette, when a grossly overweight woman exited. As she passed me, she felt obliged to tell me "You know, smoking is bad for your health."

My rejoinder?

"And fifty pounds of lard on your ass is bad for yours."

Self-righteous git.


Erica said...

I have about 50 lbs of excess "mass" [lard is against my religion, heh] on my tush, and I smoke to help curtail my appetite, in vein, so I'm sure we'd get along just fine.

Unlike your smoking critic, I do know how to keep my mouth shut, at least some of the time.

Dave said...

Erica, I doubt that you actually have 50 pounds of surplus on your tush (I'd need a photo to be sure :-) ); this pseudo-person likely DID: her belly hung down damn near to her knees,and her whole body looked like a plastic bag of Jell-O on the move...

Anonymous said...

Excellent. Just excellent. I don't smoke (since early 90s) but I can't stand anti-smoking zealots. Or really, anyone getting in your face about much of anything. I know, what the hell do I think this is -- some kind of damned individual-freedom-land or something?

I also happen to believe, from lots of reading and personal anecdotal evidence in the fam, that second-hand smoke is total BS. Also, Penn & Teller said so. Heh.

I once saw a snarkastic sticker I liked a lot on a car ("At Least I Can Still Smoke In My Car") and went out of my way to meet and greet and joke around with the owners, who turned out to be the coolest elderly couple.