Saturday, August 16, 2008

Why, yes, I AM an asshole...

Of late, I've been getting phone calls for someone whose phone number is similar (off by 1 digit) to mine. Thing is, the phone calls are from a credit collection agency, and (to their credit) they're persistent buggers.

The first few times, I tried -- patiently -- to explain to them that they had the wrong person/phone, but they seem to have taken the attitude that I'm simply lying to them: that I'm actually the person they're trying to reach.

As the calls have continued, I've gotten more and more enthusiastic about letting them know that I'm not the right person; they remain unconvinced.

At least, I think, until this morning.

Shortly after 10:00, I got another call from the putzes asking to speak to Mr. H_____. Having finally had enough of their nonsense, I calmly (but pointedly, profanely, and insultingly) began to let the person on the other end know what I thought of him, his company, collection agencies, and so on. When I was done, he tried to complain that I shouldn't be speaking to him that way -- that he was simply trying to collect a debt that was willingly incurred, and that the company that was owed the money deserved to be paid.

I responded (remaining rude, profane, and insulting) that that was all well and good, IF they were calling the person that actually owed the money; but that since they weren't, and had thus far refused to correct their error, I was entitled to address them in any manner I wished -- and that I would not only continue, but get even worse as long as they continued calling me.

At that point, a stupidvisor got on the line, and tried to give me a ration of shit about how and what I was saying. Bad move on her part.

I demonstrated to her, in no uncertain terms, that she was wrong: not only could I be more offensive and disgusting toward them, but that I would. I finished my little spiel by asking her what her job title was. After a bit of confusion, she managed to tell me that she was a "Debt Collection Specialist". I responded by asking her if she'd ever considered going into another line of work -- one with more status and prestige. Cautiously, she asked what I meant, and I calmly suggested that she might consider a career change to something like prostitution or dealing drugs.

After several seconds, SHE hung up on ME. :-)

We'll see if there are any more calls from the idiot jackasses.

Friday, August 15, 2008


Well, now I've gone and done it...

One of the captions I put on a picture at I Can Has Cheezburger has made it to their front page.

In case things have changed since I discovered it, it's the cat & the pizza box...