Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Confuzion - I haz it.

In the process of watching the various news reports of the last few weeks, and reading the comments and letters to the editor of online and print media, I have to confess that I have no small measure of confusion about a few things:

Polygamy sect
(s)
Could someone explain to me -- using something other than religious grounds -- just exactly WHAT is wrong with polygamy? I'm not talking about the 'marriages' of underage kids to adults (which should be illegal, anyway), but the practice as engaged in by adults. It's not anything I would have any interest in; I'm just curious to know what the basis is against it. For that matter, why is 'marriage' limited to a one-and-one definition, anyway? If the goal/purpose of marriage is to provide for children, stability in the relationship, and ensure that the family is suitably provided for, then I'd think that any kind of union that accomplished those goals would be acceptable. Besides, whose business is it what happens in a marriage except for those involved?
Considering all the different religions and cultures in the world, maybe it's time to stop thinking of 'marriage' as a religious construct, but rather a LEGAL one.

Gay Marriage
Again, I'm at a loss here. If two people want to join their lives together, what the hell should it matter to anyone else? Yes, I hear and read all the fussing (usually involving quotes or citations from the Bible), but none of that answers the question: what business is it of yours? If 'you' believe that marriage between two people of the same sex is immoral or sinful or whatever, then don't do it; regardless of what you may think or believe, you do NOT have any inherent 'right' to deny anyone else the freedom to live as they wish -- unless, of course, you're willing to subject yourself to someone else's beliefs, in turn?

Crime and Punishment
Lest anyone think that I'm a Liberal (with that capital 'L'), I'm not: conservatively, I think that we should have as few Laws (and as little Government) as we can manage; but that what laws we DO have should be enforced quickly and fully. I believe, for example, in the death penalty for a couple of reasons. First, that there are simply some crimes that are so vile and heinous that the death of the perpetrator is called for; second, that when the death penalty is enforced, it can serve as a deterrent to others committing the same crime. In this second case, I would call for a restoration of the policy of making such executions PUBLIC. Yes, watching someone die by hanging, electrocution, firing squad, or whatever is highly disturbing -- and that should be exactly the point: people should be able to see the consequences of committing a crime for which there is the death penalty. If someone is sentenced to the death penalty, don't give them an additional 20 years of life while they file appeal after appeal after appeal. Rather, have a team of independent judges and attorneys review the case in detail, fill in any missing details or options (i.e. a DNA test that wasn't inclued in the trial for a rape/murder), verify that all the details were properly tended to, and promptly proceed with the execution if everything matches up.
Similarly, I don't see any reason why prisons and jails should be so livable. Even though he may be going a bit overboard, I think Sheriff Joe Arpaio has the right idea. I don't think that criminal suspects and convicts should be denied legal representation or treated inhumanely, but I don't think that they should enjoy the same 'rights' as everyone else, either: they should be punished for filing frivolous types of lawsuits, they shouldn't have some inherent 'right' to cable TV, and so on. Instead, I would suggest that convicts receive only the barest minimum of treatment and care (and be worked to compensate their victims), and then earn the priveleges of (additional) TV, access to a library, recreational equipment, and so on. The money saved could be applied toward self-improvement programs (education, anger management, and the like) that would help keep them from being incarcerated again. Similarly, there should be room for DECREASING a prisoners options in the event they continue to misbehave in jail or prison: reducing the time they get to spend outside of their cells (and for what purposes), what they may have in their cells, exercise and entertainment options, and such. Basically, I'm advocating increased punishment for bad behavior, and rewarding good so that they learn (at the 'gut' level) how to behave.

Government
As mentioned before, I'm in favor of having as little Government and Law as we can manage. I don't see any point to passing laws that aren't routinely enforced. For example, here in Billings, we have a law against loud car stereos:
No driver or occupant of a motor vehicle on any public or private property shall operate or permit the operation of a sound amplification system from within a motor vehicle so that the sound is plainly audible (heard) at a distance of fifty (50) feet or more from the motor vehicle. Billings City Code- sec. 24-352. Exemptions: a. A system being operated to request assistance of an emergency nature or to warn of a hazardous situation; b. A system being operated on a vehicle of a gas, electric, communications or water utility company or governmental entity; c. A system permitted by the Billings City Council or the Billings Police Department; d. An authorized emergency vehicle; or e. Audio alarm systems installed in vehicles. BCA.sec.24-353
Good luck on filing a complaint, however: with my own two beady little eyes, I've seen 'boom cars' sitting at traffic lights right next to Billings PD vehicles. Yeah, it made someone feel warm and fuzzy inside to 'do something' about boom cars. I don't doubt that the law was passed with the best of intentions -- but since there doesn't seem to be anyone willing to enforce it, what's the point? All it seems to be for, now, is to give cops something else to add to whatever charges they might have against a driver; that, in turn, begs the question of how valid the charges are for whatever (s)he was stopped for in the first place. Here's a thought: how about if we go into the court records at the various levels of the court system, compare what charges were brought, and then eliminate any laws that haven't been used for X number of years (I'm thinking 10, but that's just a starting point) that they've been on the books? This would 'exempt' laws that haven't been in effect long enough to have much of an impact while still getting rid of the nonsense laws that have had little or NONE. Then repeat this every X years...
Next on the agenda is taxation. I don't have any problem with paying my share of the Governments operating expenses. What I do have issues is that there's virtually no way of telling whether or not what I'm paying is 'fair' -- which leaves us with the question of what we mean by 'fair'. Does fair mean that every adult pays the same flat amount (budget divided by adult population), or that everyone pays the same percentage of their income? If the former, then people making less than a certain amount are going to be hit with a tax bill they can't pay; if the latter, then those with higher incomes are shouldering more of the burden: 5% of a million dollars is a trifle more than 5% of fifty thousand. This is the kind of thing that causes the tax code to turn into a plate of spaghetti, as far as being legible is concerned. For example, the very first part of the tax code -- where it just defines who has to pay -- runs to 30,527 words on 61 pages, including all the notes, citations, and other Legal Noise. After that, things start getting seriously obtuse, what with all the sub-sub-sub-sub-clauses, cross references, exceptions, exemptions, specifications, and everything else. Just as an exercise, go to your local library, and find the shelves (there will probably be more than one) that hold all the Federal laws -- what are commonly called "Titles" (maybe some lawyer can explain the how/why of that). What you're after is the tax code, or Title 26. Pull that sucker down off the shelf, open it up anywhere, and have a look at it. Notice the size and density of the print. Have a try at reading it. THAT, friends and enemas, is what we're supposed to 'know' -- that old "ignorance of the law is no excuse" bit. Could somebody please explain to me just exactly why we need that much literary diarrhea to tell us how much money we're supposed to give the Government? Why, in God's name, can't the tax code (in its entirety) be reduced to something that a mere mortal can read and understand? Something, say, the size of a paperback book? Something that says, simply and clearly, "The tax on gross individual income will be X%. The tax on gross business income will be Y%. The following types of organizations shall be exempt from business income taxes: This, and That, and The Other One. The following goods will be taxed at the rate indicated: Petroleum products and derivatives - A% per gallon or pound, as appropriate; Foodstuffs - B% per gallon or pound, as appropriate; imported ____ - C% per ___", and so on. Also note those little periods at the end of each sentence -- as in thud, complete stop, no 'except' or 'unless' or anything else. Hell, if the damn tax code was intelligible to anyone but a lawyer, we might be able to pay it as we go along, and not need to file income tax returns. Wouldn't that be nice?
Somewhat related to the problem with the tax code is the number of federal employees we have. I actually did the research (email me, and I'll be glad to send you the resulting file), graphed the results, and found out that since 1946, the ratio of federal employees (in the whole government) versus population has halved -- that is, we now have twice as many federal employees (for our population) as we did sixty years ago. In 1946, there were just over 51 people for each federal employee; as of 1999, there was a federal employee for ever 21 peeps:
(click on image to see it better). Does anyone out there seriously believe we're getting roughly 2 1/2 times more service? Or is that much more government is 'servicing' US, instead? You think maybe if we had a little (lot!) less Government, it might not need so much money to operate?

All in all, I think all of us would be a lot better off if we were willing to assume more responsibility for ourselves and our choices, and demonstrate less interest in claiming (and trying to exercise) authority over other individuals.

But, hey, that's just me.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Linkiness

Ran across these links on the Presurfer website, and thought I'd pass them along:

What the Kollective thinks about different brand names can be found at Brand Tags. You can also contribute your own opinions, if you like.

I'm sure we all remember those Coyote vs Roadrunner cartoons, and how the coyote bought everything from Acme. Well, now you have access to the same resource: the complete illustrated Acme Catalog. Have fun!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

In praise of higher gas prices...

Today is proving to be something of an acoustic adventure:

First, the hired lawn maintenance people turned up with their riding mowers, trimmers, blowers, and other assorted devices. Following that, a crew turned up to repaint the various lines in the apartment building parking lot -- an undertaking that also involved a number of implements powered by small gasoline engines, and took no small amount of time.

As a consequence, I'm hoping that there may be some additional good come out of increasing gasoline prices: a decrease in the number of gasoline-engine powered 'tools', such as leaf blowers, trimmers, weed-whackers, lawn mowers, and so on.

I've noticed that virtually NONE of the companies that makes/sells these various gizmos bothers to put anything even faintly resembling an effective muffler on the damn things -- if some jackass wants to fire one up, pretty much everybody in a 6-block radius can hear it. And if you're one of the poor saps that happens to live next door... well, that's just too farookin' bad: you get to listen as the dipstick 'driving' it gooses the throttle repeatedly while taking his/her time about getting done whatever the hell they dug the damn thing out for.

As an Added Bonus Attraction, the shitbirds that have and use them generally opt to do so without the slightest care or concern about anyone around them: want to sleep late on a Saturday or Sunday morning? Tough! Your jackass neighbor will, in all likelihood, elect to "get an early start" on their little task.
Work from home? Fuggedaboudit!
Take a nice afternoon nap? Ain't happenin', Jack.
Try to hold a conversation with someone? Nope.
Do pretty much anything that requires even a modicum of quiet? As if...

No, I'm hoping -- praying, even -- that these bloody damn annoying pieces of crap die out because the gas for them is simply too expensive. If I'm lucky enough for that to actually happen, there will (of course) be consequences: either the folks that WERE using them will have to start doing the manual labor themselves (and thus get more exercise, and thus healthier), or hire someone to do the labor FOR them (creating more jobs, or at least putting more people to work). In addition, we have less pollution in the air and in our ears.

Friday, May 9, 2008

I know this has been around for a while, but it's still pretty damn funny (and true!)...

What's the difference between drug dealers and computer programmers?

Drug Dealers
Computer Programmers

Refer to their clients as "users".
Refer to their clients as "users".

"The first one's free!"
"Download a free trial version…"

Have important South-East Asian connections (to help move the stuff).
Have important South-East Asian connections (to help debug the code).

Strange jargon: "Stick," "Rock," "Dime bag," "E".
Strange jargon: "SCSI," "RTFM," "Java," "ISDN".

Realize that there's tons of cash in the 14- to 25-year-old market.
Realize that there's tons of cash in the 14- to 25-year-old market.

Job is assisted by the industry's producing newer, more potent mixes.
Job is assisted by industry's producing newer, faster machines.

Often seen in the company of pimps and hustlers.
Often seen in the company of marketing people and venture capitalists.

Their product causes unhealthy addictions.
DOOM. Quake. SimCity. Duke Nukem 3D. 'Nuff said.

Do your job well, and you can sleep with sexy movie stars who depend on you.
Damn! Damn! DAMN!!!

Friday, May 2, 2008

Welcome to Montana

This morning, the 2nd of May 2008, I woke up to the following scene:

Last night, the weather guessers thought that we'd get just a 'trace' of snow here in Billings; off toward the east (Hardin, MT, for example) the prediction was for as much as two feet from the storm. Here is what really happened.

I think Mother Nature needs to lay off the recreational pharmacology...

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Getting a Klew

The teaser from Fark says it all:

Hillary may be able to answer a 3am phone call, but she can't figure out a convenience store cappuccino machine
Here's the video.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Clueless

I'm sitting here, listening to Dubya blather on about rising gas and food prices -- and finding myself more and more horrified at just how freaking clueless he is about what the hell is going on, and what the solutions might be to the problems that he has mentioned (and the ones he DIDN'T talk about):

  • Gas/energy -- the real solution isn't hunting down and exploiting more oil fields, building more refineries, and 'sending messages' to the rest of the world. What I think we should be doing is putting a hell of a lot more money and effort into developing alternative energy sources (solar, wind, methane, and the like) AND insisting on increased energy efficiency AND calling for reduced energy consumption. Why, for example, does a Hummer (with abysmal mpg ratings) get a tax break when a hybrid vehicle doesn't?
  • Food prices -- this one is related to the gas/energy issue: diverting food crops to ethanol production without demanding increased fuel efficiency of the products that will be USING that ethanol is pretty much pissing into the wind. Also, the increasing cost of food is tied to the higher expense associated with moving that food from'A' to 'B', the number of products that go into food production that are oil-derived (some pesticides, for example), and the costs of fuel to the producers (you don't think those tractors and reaping machines run on magic, do you?).
  • An economy swirling around the drain -- lets see... as a nation, we're pissing away how much money on a war we shouldn't have started in Iraq (not to minimize the cost of lives)? Government regulations that didn't anticipate (or adequately address) such foolishness as 'sub-prime' mortgages, and general incompetence and inefficiency (FEMA immediately comes to mind as an example), and deficit spending at unconcionable levels.
Fucking idiot.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Commercial activity

I'm sitting here watching reruns of Cops (watching the crooks engaging in Felony Stupid amuses me), and I just saw a Burger King commercial. Is it just me, or are is that plastic 'King' character more than a little creepy? I mean, between the character and the situations they put him in, those ads are more than enough to put me off going there all by themselves.

Another one that completely puts me off my feed is that damn Dairy Queen commercial with the shrimp eating Popcorn Shrimp.

On the other hand, I do appreciate some of the commercials I've seen. I suspect I'm just one of a multitude of people that enjoys the hell out of the majority of the AFLAC commercials, for example. Another one I like is the 7-Up commercial with the Belching Bunny. I don't know if it's just a local outfit or not, but Taco Johns has been running a series of commercials that utilize W(h?)iplash the Cowboy Monkey (he's a Capuchin monkey that rides a dog) that are usually pretty funny.

Some of these outfits do a damn fine job of making their product or brand memorable - for good or ill...

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Politicians

If you want to see what people really think about politicians and other Famous People, head on over to this site and have a look. And if you're sufficiently motivated, they have a nice assortment of photos that you can add your own LOLs to:


see more funny political pictures


see more funny political pictures


see more funny political pictures

Heh.

PS - Don't forget to click on the 'Vote' thingy at the top to see the ones that didn't make the front page(s)...

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Life with the Beast of Billings

To give you some idea of what it's like having my cat, Elf, around, here's something I went through just a couple of minutes ago...

It's a kind of cold and yucky day (we've had intermittent sprinkles and snow showers; the weather guessers are claiming we may get up to an inch of snow by tomorrow), so I went into the kitchen to make myself a nice cup of hot tea. After getting a teabag out of the cabinet, I turned around to find something very much like this:

"You're gonna feed me, right?"

Since she's fed in the kitchen (a bowl of dry food all the time, and wet food every couple of days), she's of the opinion that if I go into the kitchen for anything, it must be for the express purpose of feeding her - regardless of how much food is still in either of her dishes.

Anyway, when I simply stepped around her so that I could go about heating water and all that, she finally realized that food wasn't going to be immediately forthcoming, she took up station in front of the door to a small utility closet (water heater, shelves, hooks, etc):
"I'll just wait over here, then..."

The thing about that door is that it's also where she sits when I'm doing something 'long-term': doing dishes, cooking, and such. If you look closely, you can see that there's a gap between the bottom of the door and the floor. When she's waiting for my attention again, Elf will park herself right next to the door; when she does, her tail generally slips under the door and curls around so that the tip sticks out from underneath - in front of her. Apparently believing that she has a new toy to play with, she'll try to catch it. Since she doesn't have an overabundance of brains, that isn't always successful, and her new toy escapes from her - causing her to get a trifle upset. As her impatience with being unable to catch her tail/toy grows, so does the speed and frequency with which it appears and disappears, only making the task of catching it that much harder...

Anyway, when I was done in the kitchen, I came in and sat down in the living room; a couple of minutes later, Elf turned up - electing to crouch down and stare at me for not demonstrating adequate subservience:
"You worthless *$@%&!!!"

Later tonight, I can probably expect any one of several things happen:
  • Be trampled (possibly several times) as she tears across my bed when she starts 'happy hour' (cat owners know what this is) about 20 minutes after I go to bed;
  • Have her try to catch my tongue if/when I yawn;
  • Stand on my chest/belly, and increase her local gravity so that it feels like her entire weight is on each and every one of her paws;
  • Leave a particularly smelly deposit in her litterbox, which is in the bathroom right off my bedroom.
Welcome to my world...