Well, just FARK it, then...

For the six or seven people out there that haven't heard about (or visited) Fark, it's a news conglomoration site that specializes in stuff that's weird or off-beat. The thing is, the teasers to the various stories are often as funny or more entertaining than the actual story - such as:

First 450 people who show up at Cleveland's convention centre this Saturday with a working handgun will get a $100 gas card. The first person to think this through will get $45,000 in gas cards

for this story.