Giant Noisy Cat-Eater

I haven't been happy with my "old" vacuum cleaner (isn't "vacuum cleaner" a misnomer? I mean, by definition, isn't a vacuum already clean?), and got a shiny new one with a couple of additional features some time ago. It isn't a heavy-duty industrial strength job, but that's okay - my apartment is less that 500 square feet, and only a little more than half of that is carpeted.

Today, I took it out on its maiden voyage and commenced to discover that the old machine had left behind enough cat hair that I could easily make a whole new cat if I wanted to. The spiffy attachments for it also made short work of previously troublesome areas. For the price, I'm rather pleased with it.

The cats, however, were considerably less than impressed with it. Elf took station at the farthest point in my apartment from it, while Radar sought refuge in the bathtub (!). It took a good twenty minutes before either of them was willing to see if the Giant Noisy Cat-Eater had gone away, and both of them are still a bit skittish.

The Top 10 Things You Don't Want To Hear From Tech Support

10.) "So... what are you wearing?"
9.) "Duuuuude! Bummer!"
8.) "Looks like you're gonna need some new dilythium crystals, Cap'n."
7.) "Press 1 for Support. Press 2 if you're with 60 Minutes. Press 3 if you're with the FTC."
6.) "We can fix this, but you're gonna need a butter knife, a roll of duct tape and a car battery."
5.) "I'm sorry Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that."
4.) "In layman's terms, we call that the Hindenburg Effect."
3.) "Hold on a second... Mom! Timmy's hitting me!"
2.) "Okay, turn to page 523 in your copy of Dianetics."
1.) "Please hold for Mr. Gates' attorney."

Where the fuck is Max?

During the current recess for Congress (bearing an uncanny resemblance to recess for grade-schoolers), half of our Senatorial allotment is actually out among the public, actively soliciting input from the folks that voted him into office.

The other half -- HMFIC of the Finance Committee, Max Baucus -- has yet to turn up at any similar kind of venue. After all the sturm und drang of the healthcare reform process, a body might think he'd have some interest in knowing what his constituents have to say -- but it's tough to tell, since we haven't heard anything from or about him.

Thus, my question above...